I hate ferrets in the springtime.
I hate ferrets in the fall.
I hate ferrets in the winter when it drizzles.
I hate ferrets in the summer when it sizzles.
I hate ferrets...oh why, oh why do I hate ferrets?!
Because they sneak into my house and crap all over the place!!!
We went to Florida for Spring Break. And when I came home after 11 days, I was greeted by a pissed off cat - who had ripped out a bunch of her fur and puked all over...and a fucking ferret. Yeah. You read that correctly - a FUCKING FERRET.
The neighbor bought his kid (who doesn't live there during the week) a ferret. Because apparently nothing says "love" like a smelly weasel. And said kid let said weasel out of his cage on Saturday (April 23)...and we found it on Tuesday (April 26).
Or rather, Gabriel found it. And freaked right the hell out! Jon was unloading the car, I was cleaning up Kuzco's puke, and Gabriel was putting some of his Florida loot away in his room when he starts panicking.
My kid, who is all legs and arms, comes flying down the stairs - as white as a ghost. "Oh my G-d, Mom! There is an animal in my room that isn't ours. It's just not ours. It looks like a huge possum!" And of course I didn't believe him - until he started to freak out some more. Just then Jon came in the house, and the giant possum walked down the steps. And scared the crap out of Jon.
We eventually caught the smelly little effer, and his owner came to get him. We were left with a giant mess. Poo all over the house, little niches full of stolen toys and garbage, more poo, birdseed/catfood all over the place...oh, and more poo. We were up til after 11 on Tuesday night cleaning up ferret crap. We thought we had gotten all of it. Nope. We were up til after 11 again last night cleaning up more ferret crap. And this afternoon? I found more ferret crap. IN MY COUCH.
I don't condone violence against animals. Ever. I don't really even like hunting. But if I EVER see that mother effer again...Momma's gonna whoop some ferret ass.
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Chompers!
In the past 3 days, we've been to the dentist's office 3 times. Which means that we've been there every day this week. Yay.
Monday's trip was to check out Janna's snaggle tooth. It wasn't good. So we went back on Tuesday for a baby root canal. She was a tropper! No complaints before, during, or after the procedure! She still has her snaggle tooth, but that will be fixed when we get back from Florida. But snaggle tooth aside, she's still stinking cute!
Gabe and Elliott went to the dentist this morning for routine cleanings. In addition to a new toothbrush, Gabriel left the appointment with a little jar of teeth. He had to have 3 teeth pulled (because the adult teeth were growing up behind the baby teeth). He thinks he looks so cool!
And I happen to agree!
Monday's trip was to check out Janna's snaggle tooth. It wasn't good. So we went back on Tuesday for a baby root canal. She was a tropper! No complaints before, during, or after the procedure! She still has her snaggle tooth, but that will be fixed when we get back from Florida. But snaggle tooth aside, she's still stinking cute!
Gabe and Elliott went to the dentist this morning for routine cleanings. In addition to a new toothbrush, Gabriel left the appointment with a little jar of teeth. He had to have 3 teeth pulled (because the adult teeth were growing up behind the baby teeth). He thinks he looks so cool!
And I happen to agree!
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Marvelous Melatonin
I hate temper tantrums. Hate, hate, hate them. They drive me absolutely nuts. And Elliott is the Queen of Tantrums. Girlfriend can whip herself into a frenzy in seconds. She can go from being completely at ease, to being completely uncontrollable. She screams, stomps, throws herself to the floor, turns herself purple, kicks, spits...it's enough to make me want to sell her on eBay.
The majority of Elliott's tantrums happen at bedtime. Which makes everyone miserable. Her brother and sister can't sleep because she's screaming at the top of her lungs. Jon and I can't relax, because she's screaming at the top of her lungs. And because she's screaming at the top of her lungs? She's not sleeping. And when she gets up in the morning after a piss poor night's sleep, she's miserable. And the tantrums pick right back up where they left off the night before. And because she's screaming at the top of her lungs at the breakfast table? She's not eating. Which is causing her to have what Jon calls "hunger anger." It's just awful.
I've discussed Elliott's ridonkulous behavior with her pediatrician, and Dr. Y's reaction is "meh...it's a stage....she'll get over it...YOU'LL get over it..." Which is all good and wonderful - except that I have to live with her screaming ass. And she's unpleasant.
A few weeks ago, I was talking to the husband of a friend, and he mentioned that one of their kiddos was a lot like Elliott. To curb her behavior, they give her melatonin. And it worked really, really well. She was sleeping better, and life was just better.
When I got home, I did a little research. And then I forgot about it when Elliott threw another monster tantrum. Until last Thursday. When Elliott threw 8 (EIGHT) separate tantrums is less than 2 hours. OMFG. It was terrible. Something as simple as flushing the toilet set her off so completely that she was puking. I drove myself to the grocery store and bought a bottle of 1mg melatonin tablets. That night we gave her half of a tablet.
When she woke up after 11.5 hours of sleep, she was a completely different child. In the last 5 days, there hasn't been a single, solitary tantrum!! She's sleeping for at least 11 hours a night (last night was 12). She's eating better, and she's able to concentrate on whatever task it at hand. Her behavior and participation at school are better. And life...is quiet. And me likey quiet!!
The majority of Elliott's tantrums happen at bedtime. Which makes everyone miserable. Her brother and sister can't sleep because she's screaming at the top of her lungs. Jon and I can't relax, because she's screaming at the top of her lungs. And because she's screaming at the top of her lungs? She's not sleeping. And when she gets up in the morning after a piss poor night's sleep, she's miserable. And the tantrums pick right back up where they left off the night before. And because she's screaming at the top of her lungs at the breakfast table? She's not eating. Which is causing her to have what Jon calls "hunger anger." It's just awful.
I've discussed Elliott's ridonkulous behavior with her pediatrician, and Dr. Y's reaction is "meh...it's a stage....she'll get over it...YOU'LL get over it..." Which is all good and wonderful - except that I have to live with her screaming ass. And she's unpleasant.
A few weeks ago, I was talking to the husband of a friend, and he mentioned that one of their kiddos was a lot like Elliott. To curb her behavior, they give her melatonin. And it worked really, really well. She was sleeping better, and life was just better.
When I got home, I did a little research. And then I forgot about it when Elliott threw another monster tantrum. Until last Thursday. When Elliott threw 8 (EIGHT) separate tantrums is less than 2 hours. OMFG. It was terrible. Something as simple as flushing the toilet set her off so completely that she was puking. I drove myself to the grocery store and bought a bottle of 1mg melatonin tablets. That night we gave her half of a tablet.
When she woke up after 11.5 hours of sleep, she was a completely different child. In the last 5 days, there hasn't been a single, solitary tantrum!! She's sleeping for at least 11 hours a night (last night was 12). She's eating better, and she's able to concentrate on whatever task it at hand. Her behavior and participation at school are better. And life...is quiet. And me likey quiet!!
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Sunday, March 6, 2011
My Sweet Smelliott!
I was going through my posts the other day, and I found a few that I had started...and then not finished. One of them being Elliott's 5th birthday announcement. So...without further ado, here it is!!
My wee girl at 2 days old. Yes, I know I've posted this picture on my blog before. But I can't help myself . It's one of my favorites.
Smelli June cuddling on the couch with her Barbie birthday snuggie!
Every time I look at these pictures, I have a mini-stroke. Elliott is 5?! How in the hell did that happen?
I know - my reactions are the same each time one of the kids has a birthday. But it really does seem impossible that she's 5. Or maybe I should say only 5. While it does seem like only yesterday I brought home my sweet little moose of a baby (girlfriend was over 9 pounds when she was born), there are days when it doesn't seem possible that she hasn't been annoying her siblings for at least 10 years!!
Happy 5th birthday to my sweet, annoying, whiny, Metallica-loving Elliott Jane! You make every day brighter...and just a little more interesting! I couldn't love you more if I tried!
When did this:
My wee girl at 2 days old. Yes, I know I've posted this picture on my blog before. But I can't help myself . It's one of my favorites.Become this?
Smelli June cuddling on the couch with her Barbie birthday snuggie!Every time I look at these pictures, I have a mini-stroke. Elliott is 5?! How in the hell did that happen?
I know - my reactions are the same each time one of the kids has a birthday. But it really does seem impossible that she's 5. Or maybe I should say only 5. While it does seem like only yesterday I brought home my sweet little moose of a baby (girlfriend was over 9 pounds when she was born), there are days when it doesn't seem possible that she hasn't been annoying her siblings for at least 10 years!!
Happy 5th birthday to my sweet, annoying, whiny, Metallica-loving Elliott Jane! You make every day brighter...and just a little more interesting! I couldn't love you more if I tried!
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